On Wednesday at 1:30 a.m. our family suffered the loss of my father-in-law. To my children he was Papa. To DB, his other children, and us spouses he was Dad. And he never failed to treat us accordingly; that is as if we were his own. We are so blessed to have this patriarch in our family. He is one of Tom Brokaw's Greatest Generation, and soon to be a lost generation as time goes on.
Dad was a man's man. No nonsense, no fluff, no frivolity. He was loving, generous and strong, a true rock. He could barely boil water, never took a mop in his hand that I ever saw and wouldn't grocery shop to save his life. Yet, he provided solely for his family of five, built the home we all live in and provided a wonderful role model to six grandsons. How could we ever ask for more? To say we will all miss him just isn't sufficient.
I think my favorite funny memory of Dad was way back when DB and I were just dating--long distance. One weeknight evening my father allowed me to make the one and 1/2 hour trip down here from up north with my music teacher to visit DB, my then high school sweetheart. My music teacher was taking graduate courses in our capital city and made the trip twice weekly. The arrangement was that I would come down with my teacher, stay overnight with a girlfriend and then DB would drive me home on Saturday morning. As a teenager you can imagine the talking I had to do to get my father to agree! So we had gone out shopping and DB noticed when we were getting back in the car that there was a huge bolt laying on the ground beside his (very old) car. Well we carefully drove home (pre-cell phone era) and DB asked Papa what he thought about it and was it serious? I remember Dad rubbing his chin, taking a deep sigh and letting it out loudly, then shaking his head. His report was that this bolt was indeed critical and that it would be impossible to drive the car anywhere, certainly not 85 miles north into the country. At that very moment I felt my heart stop. I imagined the look on my fathers face, and so on. Then...after a brief pause he laughed and explained that that bolt was much too big to belong on a car and it certainly wasn't something to worry about. You can imagine my relief!! It was then and there that I came to learn my father-in-laws quiet and not often revealed sense of humor. But when he delivered a joke it was a GOOD one for sure.
On holidays the big deal was what to get Dad. All he'd ever say was, "Aw, I don't need anything." So you went far above and beyond the call of duty to get that ONE thing that perhaps he would use. As of late it got much easier because his sweet tooth ran wild. I tried to always keep him stocked in snacks for his bedroom. Chocolate, individually wrapped cookies, etc. Upon passing his room you'd often hear the crinkling of wrappers. Yup, Dad was having his bedtime snack :)
In the evening here at home I loved how Dad sometimes had to find where we all were to say his Goodnights. But he always made sure he did as each of us have different routines. I can still hear him saying "Good night Lyn" up the stairs. I hope I can always hear him.
Dad has his favorite chair in the house which we affectionately called the "command center". It contained cubby holes in the arm for magazines, pens, paper, candy and whatever else he deemed necessary. It even had a phone in it. Some years ago it was a gift from Nana to him. Recently and sadly he had to retire that chair as the bottom was just plain wore out. It was replaced by another recliner but not as elaborate. Now that chair sits empty. I don't know what we'll do. But for now I like it there. I can still see him there watching TV, opening Christmas gifts, listening to one of the kids share something with him, or taking a catnap. It is sadly comforting. I miss you Dad--beyond measure. We all do. I don't know what life will be like without you.
The one thing I DO know is that you are in heaven now. Scripture tells us that when we pass on and go to heaven that we will have glorious heavenly bodies. While I don't know what that is, I do know that you are not dizzy or in pain anymore. You are peaceful, healthy and able to anything you choose. I also know that you and Mom have likely found some quiet place and are catching up after being parted for six long years. For this I can be happy. I know that you've seen the face of Jesus. I know the angels rejoiced when you arrived. I know that forever you will be in peace. Praise be to God. Thank you God for creating this family, chosen by Your design.
My prayers are with you. I lost by beloved father-in-law a couple of years ago. He was so woven into the fabric of our family. It was a huge loss. I know it is hard to take comfort sometimes but he has had a difficult year with his health and now he sits at the right hand of God. What a blessing that LL got to know her papa!
ReplyDeleteJust wanted you to know that we are praying for your family and we are sorry for your loss. What a beautiful tribute to your father-in-law. You obviously loved him dearly. Isn't it amazing how God puts families together and how He provides comfort to us by fulfilling his promises when it is time to call them home? May God ease your pain and fill your heart with many precious memories during this time.
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